Friday, January 7, 2011

The New Year

This is it, the New Year, the year in which we all change something.  Swear to ourselves that this year will be different, this year we will be better, this year we will do better for ourselves, our loved ones, our pets.  This year we will set and maintain goals, we will be more fun, more spontaneous, more exciting, more responsible, more, more, more...

That's something isn't it?  These broad promises we make to ourselves and then break and then torture ourselves over breaking them. We set ourselves up for disappointment, we think "Surely I must be able to keep these five, ten, eighteen promises to myself...There is soo much time in a year!  Certainly 365 days is plenty of time to do everything?"  I tell you this, after a disappointing year of breaking all my resolutions, this year I only hope. 

This year I hope will be better than the last.  This year I hope to do things for myself that I normally don't do...this year I hope to make more and do more.  This year I hope I can speak up when I am upset, rather than bite my tongue for fear of hurting the feelings of others.  This year I hope I can live more gently and thoughtfully, spend more time with my family, and find a way to make it all work.  This year I hope I can help people better understand me and I hope I can be clear when expressing myself.  This year I hope I can let go of resentment and jealousy and live happily within my own life with my own limitations. 

Most of all, this year I hope Ryan gets what he wants so that he can be happy and my that little boy (no longer a baby but a toddler, a boy) continues to grow and thrive and be healthy and happy.

Happy New Year to you, my wish is that you can realize at least some of your hopes for this new year.