There is so much that I know and don't know about my mom that it is sometimes a little startling. I know that she is kind, she would give me her last penny if I needed it, even though it would mean she would have to do without for weeks on end. She is an amazing cheerleader, encouraging me along my way when I get lost or am bogged down by self-doubt. She has counseled me through fights with boyfriends, frustrations with school and conflicts in my workplace.
She listens to me and lets me ramble, she backs off when I am cranky,soothes me when I'm sad and laughs with me when I am happy.She did her best as a mother and helped my brother and I develop our personalities without question, she did her best to lead us away from bad decisions to help us recognize when we were being stubborn, unreasonable and, in my case, very very loud.
All this I know about my mom, but there are so many things that I don’t know about her when she was a child or a teenager. I know she and her brothers and sisters spent some time in a children’s home while her parents were separating. I remember her once saying that they tried to run away. I know that she deeply loved her mother, but that she was a Daddy’s girl. I know that at some point they moved from Brooklyn to California, but I don’t know how old she was when tat happened. I know that her sisters, like most older sisters, teased and harassed her and that she was deathly afraid to tell on them lest she suffer their wrath. I know that she met my Dad in Tucson, but I’m still not clear on what she was doing there. I wish I knew more about her when she was little, what she was like. Was she as quiet as is she is now, drown out by the loud boisterous people that surrounded her? Was she athletic? (I vaguely remember hearing something about running track and field.)
I imagine my mom was a sweet little girl always doing her best to behave herself and gain the favor of the Pop by doing so, with two fun-loving, hell-raising sisters and two big brothers. I imagine well groomed children at dinner and saying blessings in Spanish before meals and always coming inside before the street lights went out. I imagine this but do not know if it is true. I wish I knew more about Mom.
Happy Birthday, Mom. I love you.
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